The Worst Restaurant Special Ever (or, Why Word Choice Matters)
Harping on other people’s word choice and phrasing is one of the grandest old traditions of MA101, going back to the days when this blog was mostly about writing and I actually stuck to that theme.
Most of you weren’t around for that. Don’t worry, you didn’t miss much.
But I’ve kept the word choice remnant because hey, it’s funny. Case in point the new menu at Pasqual’s on Monroe St. in Madison, WI, a restaurant I’m overall pretty fond of but that needs to fire their graphic designer and/or copywriter:
This is not how I would have chosen to sell this particular idea.
I’m not sure it’s all that enticing of an idea in general, but if you’re going to have the option of dinner with or without a side, you should probably make the side sound like a delicious extra option that people want, rather than an added hassle that the restaurant will take away for you at request.
Maybe they charge less if you have it without sides? We don’t know — the menu doesn’t say. It just offers to take the side away if you don’t want it.
Some basic human nature here: when you say “Hey, here’s a bunch of stuff that I am going to give you in exchange for your money; do you want me to give you less than that maybe?” most people do not say “Sure, screw me over.”
And when you pitch it like that it sounds like you’re offering a right screwing-over, whether that’s the intention or not.
So word choice. When you’re offering options, make every option sound like a good one. Extra Sides, Only $1! Or even “FREE SIDE OF RICE AND BEAN (on request)” would work.
But not, please, “dinners available without rice and beans.” Because who’s going to take that?
And as long as I’m giving Pasqual’s a hard time (love you guys, but seriously, this menu), the large order of nachos is a real steal right now:
So yeah. Choose your words carefully, and I guess check your work, too.
Tomorrow: The editorial voice, as demonstrated by a traveling lizard show!
I love picking at businesses word choice in advertising and other materials, but it’s also a curse. A normal person would have just enjoyed their meal, but you were probably thinking the whole time about how little thought was put into the menu.
Oh, a few margaritas helps with just about any sort of distraction, I’ve found. And the drink menu has a much tidier layout than the food menu.
Love your little rant. I do that kind of thing, too, all the time. It’s too easy. It just seems to be EVERYWHERE. Like misused Apostrophe’s. Very popular where I live.
I see what you did there!
Menus and hand-written signs at the farmers’ market are easy targets and ones that I’m not going to point at and snicker. The real egregious errors that deserve your scorn are those written by professionals writers who have access to grammar checkers, spell checkers, dictionaries, and human editors.
Well, I feel a bit justified on this one since they had a perfectly serviceable menu for years. In fact, the items haven’t changed at all. It’s the same menu, they just clearly paid someone to turn it into this monstrosity.
Would two half orders of the nachos be $18.50 or $5.95?!?!?