Quod scripsi, scripsi.

I’ve already Tweeted about this once or twice, but I want us all to be very clear:  if you see me flipping you off in a bar, it’s not because I’m ordering you a drink.

Ordinarily one wouldn’t expect that to need clarification.  But the advertising wonks at Austin Nichols have apparently decided to promote a very odd new social meme:

For those that didn’t watch, that’s a woman flipping a man off.  He grins at his friend and says “she just ordered me a Wild Turkey,” at which point the narrator growls “GIVE ‘EM THE BIRD” and we fade to black right around the point where it’s appropriate to fade to black.

I like bars, and I like bourbon, and I like obscenity, so this sort of thing would usually be right up my alley, but I just can’t get past the potential for serious miscommunication.  This was an advertisement that needed more thinking-through.  I mean, consider:

• First off, bartenders aren’t going to know what’s going on until the practice gets serious exposure.  So while it’s in the process of becoming honest-to-god memetic you’re going to see pretty bad service on your Wild Turkey orders.

• Same point as above for the people you’re actually “giving the bird,” except that the consequences of flipping strangers off is likely to be more directly unpleasant.

• Assuming all the stars align and everyone involved understands exactly what you’re all about you’ve still just stuck them with a glass of Wild Turkey, which tastes like a clown is raping your mouth.

Say, maybe that’s the actual subtext here.  “Order them our bourbon.  It’s like saying ‘fuck you’ anyway!”  Give ‘em the bird.

Maybe I just don’t watch enough TV.  I don’t actually own one, so I only see whatever paid-for ads pop up when I occasionally watch something online.  Are the other commercials these days encouraging really poor communication skills too?  Or are these things popular enough that I should, in fact, smile and nod affectionately next time someone flips me off in a bar?

Naaaah.